Psychology
by SolemnSerpent
Summary: What if a special infected can't let go of its past? When a boy becomes a Tank, his little sister's stuffed animal becomes his only link between humanity and insanity.


**Author's Note:**

**Surprise! This idea came to me in a random daydream about Left 4 Dead. A little encouragement from T-Virus Rose and this story was born.**

**Left 4 Dead concept/characters (c) Valve.**

**~x~**

**Prologue- The Giraffe**

The weather outside was beautiful. The sky was the color of a robin's egg, with no cloud in sight. A warm breeze wafted in the open window, penetrating the frigid air-conditioned classroom. Everything looked so inviting. For the fiftieth time that day, I wished I was outside, enjoying the last traces of summer with my sister Emma. Right now she was home, preparing for her first step into the sixth grade. I was in tenth grade, having completed my freshman year already. By 'completed' I meant barely scraping by with the minimum grade requirements. I had had nothing but foul and peevish teachers all year, who enjoyed lording it over the students. How they ever got teaching jobs was beyond me. In a hope that my grades would improve, they had sent me to this boarding school, somewhere in Florida. My parents and sister were still in California, whose weather, I'd heard, was starting to get cold. They'd sent me a postcard last week, all three of them smiling up at the camera. Emma had also sent over her stuffed giraffe, her most prized possession. Said giraffe was now safely stowed in my oversized backpack for safekeeping, so that I took it with me wherever I went. It was a comforting feeling, to see that giraffe. I could picture Emma's smile as she played with it, and it eased some of the homesickness. The state of Georgia were no comparison for the greenery of California, of the pine trees and jagged hills and the strange, bizarre weather that surprised many every day. I loved it there, and as soon as this year was over I would head back there on a one-way flight.

The current period was Algebra, and pencils were scraping against paper as the rest of the students bent over their homework, intent on finishing it before the end of class. I sighed and bent over the problems as well, groaning silently at the arithmetic. I _hated_ math with a passion. Still, the homework was relatively easy, and within ten minutes I had no more algebra homework for the night. I leaned back in my chair and stretched, returning my gaze to the open window. I toyed with the over-large necklace around my neck, fiddling with it unconsciously. It was another gift from my blessing of a younger sister, one she had made in the first grade. There was a beautiful rainbow pattern of beads on either side of a clay charm, which bore the letter 'J', my first initial of my name; Jason. It was something just as precious as the stuffed giraffe, and I hadn't taken if off since receiving it in sixth grade. It was something of a good luck charm.

Absentmindedly tugging at the necklace, I kept facing the window. From here I could see a stretch of high grass, which ended at a large, solid gray wall. On the other side, I could see the white tents of the CEDA encampment. I frowned at this. CEDA had informed most of the schools of a risk of infection that was spreading here on the East Coast. They said it was nothing to worry about, but they had set up encampments everywhere. Plus there were rumors, whispers about whole towns being overrun by the living dead… but no, that couldn't be true? This infection would blow over, and then everything would be back to normal. That's how it always was, right?

I nearly fell out of my chair as the alarm sirens blared in the school, filling my ears with a high-pitched wail. It was the evacuation siren, the one that sounded when the school was under attack. On cue, most of the students stood up and started to close the windows, pulling the shutters over them. The door was shut and locked. In these emergencies, the entire school was to go into lockdown. Everyone crammed themselves under the desks, and for once talking ceased. This was no drill, I could tell from the teacher's face. This was a real attack. On instinct I pulled the stuffed giraffe from my backpack and started to stroke the faux fur, hoping that the alarm was nothing serious. After all, the CEDA were practically next door to the school. I heard footsteps in the hallway, and I frowned. There shouldn't have been students in the hallway; it was the middle of the morning period! Perhaps they had gone to the bathroom and were now rushing back despite protocol? They were supposed to stay in the bathrooms and lock the door! I heard moaning too, a low, strange noise that resounded through the classroom. I shuffled around underneath the desk until I was facing the classroom door, whose window clearly showed the hallway. And then the thing smashed against the glass, horrible bloody mutilated face shrieking and groaning. Screams issued from several of the classmates, including me. The _thing_… was horrible! The door's window shattered, and I saw a grayish hand reach through the gap, trying to get at us from the outside. The teacher, finally panicking, jumped up and ran to the classroom phone, punching in numbers frantically as the groaning grew louder.

'CEDA? Yes, this is Mr. Smith from the Jefferson Boarding School. We have infected trying to break into our classroom! Please send help immediately!'

The teacher was practically screaming into the receiver, which seemed to aggravate the thing at the door. _That thing… is an infected person?_ I stared at the bloody creature in horror, and then I felt my stomach lurch as I made out the remains of a human face in the bloody mess of its head. The thing had obviously been shot in the face, but it hadn't been enough to kill the person. I turned away, not wanting to look at the infected any longer. If THAT was the Green Flu, I didn't want to stay in Florida any second longer. And then I heard it. There was a faint noise coming from the windows. Almost like… something was tapping on it. I heard groaning noises coming from outside, and I knew it was more infected. Just how had they gotten in here anyway? I though the CEDA encampment would be more secure than this! The glass of the window shattered, and everybody screamed as a body tumbled into the classroom face first, writhing on the ground as it tried to get up. 'Everyone! Run to the CEDA encampment!' I yelled, pointing out the now-open window to the short gray wall and the white tents. All the students followed my lead as I vaulted over the windowsill, still clutching the stuffed giraffe. No way in hell was I going to let go of the giraffe now. There were more infected in the grass field now, straggling monsters covered in bloodstains. As we moved towards the wall, their heads shot up, drawn towards the noise. The infected charged forward, some of them tackling students to the ground. I felt guilty as hell, but I ignored the pinned students' screams as the infected attacked, but instead kept going towards the wall. It was short enough to vault over, as long as I maintained some momentum. I was the first to reach the wall, and without a glance backward I cleared the wall. A few students managed to follow me, around ten, but the rest hadn't made it. My blood ran cold as I heard the screams mount, and then suddenly stop. I exchanged glances with the other students, my breath coming in gasps and pants. And then we noticed the tents. Every white tent was empty. CEDA was gone.

My jaw dropped to the ground, and I dashed forward, refusing to believe the facts. CEDA couldn't be gone! But as I moved through the tents, searching, I felt dread growing in my stomach. Nobody had been there. And from the supplies scattered around on the ground, I could tell that everyone here had packed up and left in a hurry. I turned back to the other students, my face impassive.

"We've been left for dead." I said, and at my words another student burst into tears. She was a year older than me, and had been one of the top students at the boarding school. She had been prepared for the rest of high school and college, but she hadn't been prepared for this. "What do we do?" she asked, turning to me, her face clouded with tears. The other students also looked to me, and with that I was appointed leader. I cleared my throat, unsure of what to do.

"W-well, first things first. Um…. We need a way to defend ourselves from those _things._ It looked like CEDA left some stuff behind, maybe we can improvise some weapons or something…" I trailed off, hesitant. I had never been placed into any sort of leader role like this before. The other students were staring at me, looking to me for help. I turned and walked into the sea of white tents, my eyes searching the ground for something, _anything_! My eyes settled on a red object nearby, and I bent down to pick up a fire ax. I hefted the thing easily, used to the weight from long years spent in my father's carpenter's shop. I had been trained to carry heavy objects. There were also red backpacks with the white cross stitched on the front. First-Aid. I scooped up the red backpacks and brought them back to where the other students were. To my relief, some of them had gotten their hands on some baseball bats. One of them even had a gun, a small pistol that glinted dangerously in the sunlight. I deposited the backpacks on the ground, and everyone took one. I unzipped the backpack and placed the stuffed giraffe inside, ignoring the strange looks of the other students. I put the backpack on, and then hefted the fire ax.

"Well, I think we should head to the evacuation center in the mall." I said, pointing towards the white building in the distance. CEDA, of course, had set up air evac in case the infection spread. The other students nodded their heads in assent, and I started forward, getting used to the feeling of the ax. It would take ten-minute walk to get to Savannah Mall, and then this nightmare would end. As we walked down the deserted streets, I looked around, surprised. Had the infection only hit our school? I couldn't see anyone in the street, or in the park. The supermarket was similarly deserted. Where was everyone? Had CEDA already called an evacuation? But as I looked at the mall, I could see a black helicopter slowly descend. I pointed at it, excited. "There! There's a helicopter! Come on, let's go!" I cried, and we all surged forward, excited. Pretty soon we were jogging in the street at a fast pace, restraining ourselves from outright dashing towards the evac center and the safety of the military. But our progress was stopped at the appearance of the first infected. It was a man, covered in some kind of puke, stumbling along the cement with a slack-jawed expression. We all stopped, unsure of what to do. The face turned towards us, and with a scream the infected charged forward at me. Without hesitation, I swung the ax forward. It bit into the man's neck, and the infected collapsed as blood poured from the wound, and the creature collapsed to the ground, shuddering and gasping as it slowly bled to death. I stared down at the infected in shock, gasping for breath. I had _killed _it. Turning away, I threw up on the ground, emptying my stomach's contents on the pavement. After a few minutes, I wiped my mouth and stood up again. "Let's just get to the evac center." I said, greeted with silence. I started forward again, holding the bloody ax in both hands.

I almost cried with relief as we reached the parking lot of the mall, which was just as deserted as the rest of Savannah. As far as I could tell, the evacuation would be in the back parking lot of the mall. We'd have to go through the mall to get to the CEDA evac. As we approached the mall, I spotted a small figure perched on the roof. Was it… on fire? It looked odd and disfigured… And then something shot down and wrapped itself around one of the student's legs. Terrified, the boy was dragged across the parking lot, screaming loudly, dropping his weapon in his desperate struggle to free himself. As I watched, horrified, I realized that the appendage wrapped around the boy was a _tongue_. That thing on the room had been human… once. "Run! Run for the evac!" I screamed, and everyone charged forward, shoving each other in desperation to get away from the creature that was now dragging the boy up the building, slowly reeling him in. I opened the glass doors and everyone thundered in, gasping and panting for breath. We were all terrified. The mall of clear of infected, as far as I could tell. We could see the evac at the end of the mall, with military standing by. We all dashed forward, each of us glad to see the end of our flight. However, we stopped when guns were leveled at us.

"Have any of you come into close contact with the infected? Have any of you killed an infected?" A man said his voice slightly muffled behind his medical mask. I raised my hand, and the man nodded. "Nobody else?" he asked, and everyone shook his or her heads.

"Good. Everyone besides the boy who raised his hand, you may proceed to evacuation and interment. Please hand over cellphones or any other method of communication before you get on the helicopter." the man said, his voice cool and collected. Eagerly, without a second glance, the group of students surged towards the helicopter, all of them passing off cellphones to the man collecting them before leaving out of the back entrance of the mall and boarding the helicopter. I stood there, struck dumb. Why couldn't I go? Now the military moved forward, and I backed up, unsure of what to do.

"There is a possibility you may be infected. You will not attempt to board the helicopter; resistance will be met with lethal force." the man said, and I looked at him in shock. Infected? Me? "There is a safe house just behind you. I advise you to go hide. Good day." the man said, and he backed up and boarded the helicopter. One by one the military retreated, and then the helicopter roared to life. The force of the helicopter blades flattened my hair, and I stood mute as my fellow students were flown away. I was alone.

Mere seconds after the helicopter had left, I collapsed onto the ground, tears blurring my vision as I unzipped the giraffe and clutched the stuffed animal. Escape had been dangled before me briefly, and then snatched away because I had protected the group. It was too overwhelming. I sobbed loudly, burying my face in the warm fuzziness of the stuffed giraffe. _I am going to die._ And that was a fact.

After a minute or five, my sobs finally stilled into silence, though my shoulders still shook. The giraffe's fur was damp with my tears, and I shakily wiped my nose, unsure of what to do. The fire ax was nearby, but at the sight of the blood I shuddered and clutched the stuffed giraffe to my chest instead. The man had said it earlier. I could be _infected._ What did it matter anymore? I was going to become some brain-fried monster anyway. I wouldn't be able to go home, wouldn't be able to see my parents, and wouldn't be able to see Emma. Never. The thought of that nearly plunged me into tears again. Sniffing loudly, I stood up shakily, holding the giraffe close for comfort. The mall remained dead silent and deserted. I noticed that though the lights were out, none of the stores were closed. I gave a small smile as I noticed a video game store in close proximity. Why the hell not? Why not enjoy my last moments?

And then there was a crash, and the sound of breaking glass. I froze, silent, unsure of what to do. Was it infected, finally breaking in? My eyes flickered back to my fire ax, still lying there on the ground. The CEDA man had mentioned something called a 'safe room'. It was in my best interest to go there. I heard another crash, and then the sound of voices. Survivors?

"Damn it! Here too? I thought the evac centers were supposed to still be open!" A man's voiced drawled, sounding angry and desperate. I flinched, looking for somewhere to hide, but it was too late. Four survivors rounded the corner, three men and a woman. One man was wearing a slightly dirtied white suit and a blue dress shirt; one was wearing overalls, a cap, and a yellow t-shirt advertising some sort of company. Then there was the black football coach from one of the neighboring high schools. What he was doing here, I had no clue. The last one, a black woman, was someone I had seen on the news reporting about minor cases of the outbreak. All of them had slightly maniac expression, coupled with fear, distress, and anger. I couldn't blame them, but as we made eye contact, I noticed all of them were carrying guns. For a second they raised their weapons, but realizing that I wasn't a monster, they lowered them. We stared at each other for a second, and then the woman stepped forward.

"What's your name?" she asked, her voice kind and full of pity. She had definitely noticed my tear-stained face.

"Jason, ma'am." I said, my voice quivering. The woman smiled at that, and then pointed at herself. "My name is Rochelle," she said, "And this is Coach, Nick, and Ellis." She pointed at each one in turn. Now the one named Nick came forward, his face an unreadable mask. "What happened here, kid?" he asked, his voice a growled. I flinched at his words, and then stared down at the floor. Rochelle shot a warning glance at Nick, and then rested her hand on my shoulder.

"Me… and my classmates got here after our school was attacked. On the way here, I killed one of those… _things_ to protect everyone else. We were here in time for the last evacuation helicopter. A strange infected managed to snag one of the students from the roof of the mall, and everyone dashed in here. But…" my voice faltered as I choked back tears. Rochelle patted my shoulder, her eyes soft. "CEDA wouldn't let me onto the evac helicopter. They said since I killed an infected, there was a chance that I was infected. One of the CEDA men told me to find some place called a 'saferoom', and that was it. My classmates ditched me without a second thought, and I was left here. Then you came." I finished, giving the stuffed giraffe in my arms a hearty squeeze.

"I'm very sorry, Jason. I'm so sorry." Rochelle said, her voice full of sadness.

"The man said the safe room was that way." I said, pointing in that direction, knowing that I would be going with them. The man named Nick grunted in thanks and passed us, already heading for the safe room. Coach nodded at me as he passed by, and I saw the one named Ellis wipe a few tears before shouldering his gun and heading on.

"Is that giraffe important to you?" Rochelle asked, pointing to the stuffed animal in my arms. I cast a glance down at it before replying.

"It's my sister's giraffe. She's in California with my parents, so she wanted something to keep me company. It means the world to me." I said simply, hugging the stuffed animal tightly. Rochelle smiled silently at that, and then turned away.

Ten seconds later I slammed into her, knocking her out of the way as an infected dropped down from a higher level, screaming as it did so. The infected landed next to me, and before I could do anything but gasp the thing had already sunk its teeth into my shoulder. The thing was trying to gnaw my arm off! Screaming, I flailed rapidly, trying to move as my arms were pinned when the infected dragged me to the ground. More infected were appearing now, breaking through windows from the upper and lower levels. Rochelle recovered from her state of disbelief to shoot the infected eating my arm, and stooped to help me up. Blood seeped through the wound in my shoulder, staining my shirt and part of the stuffed giraffe. I felt weak as she pulled me to my feet, and I stumbled after her, trying to keep up as she made a mad dash to the safe room. I heard a squealing noise behind me, and suddenly I felt something splash all over my body. It was an acidic green liquid, and to my horror it began to sizzle and burn wherever it touched, clothing or flesh. The pain! I dropped the stuffed giraffe and screamed loudly, thrashing around as the acid burned my body. It hurt, it hurt so much! I screamed again, falling to the floor, writhing in agony. Something appeared in front of my vision, and I looked up into the face of a horrible creature for a split second. The mouth was missing, with only a gaping half-hole with the same green acid dripping from it. The neck was long and saggy, the breasts half appearing over a torn bra, and the stomach was twisted and bloated. It squealed at me, and then proceeded to claw at me, tearing at my burning skin. I heard a shot sound, and the thing fell on top of me, producing more green acid. I screamed and screamed again and again, unable to process anything else besides the agony of this slow death. I lay on my side, watching as my skin blackened before my eyes. And then I saw Rochelle, running back to help me.

"NO!" I screamed, desperate. I didn't want her death on my hands. "Run! GET TO THE SAFE ROOM!" I screamed again, and then my voice failed me. Rochelle stopped, her emotions conflicting. I could tell she wanted to save me, but it was too late… Darkness was growing in my mind, and the acid-soaked wound on my shoulder burned. I saw her turn and run, until her figure was out of sight. The infected ignored me; hidden underneath the acid-Spitter infected's body. I could see the giraffe in the corner of my eye; I reached out one acid-burned hand and drew the stuffed animal to my chest, sighing with relief as I felt the comfortable faux fur brush against my dead skin. _At least now I can die as a human. _I closed my eyes, nestling my face into the stuffed giraffe's fur, feeling my grip on reality slip away. _Good-bye, Emma._


End file.
